The Scarcity Farce

A few months ago, I was chastised for claiming to feel horrified by a toy I found offensive...which was apparently wrong of me because genital mutilation and rape are rampant in Africa.

My response was to blink a few times, shake my head, and choose to not respond.

A few days later, I was called petty for making a joke about a tense situation in our new home because a week prior I'd been homeless.

That time I was pissed. Considering how little I complained relative to how much I suffered, I felt offended at the idea that I wasn't allowed to feel anything other than gratitude that things weren't worse.

The idea that I should feel guilty for even jokingly complaining because others have it worse, or because I could have had it worse, operates on the underlying belief that both joy and suffering are finite, and that if I am suffering less than someone else, I must have more joy that that other person.

But just like love, joy and pain are both infinite and limitless. It is possible to feel profound joy and profound pain at the same time. It is possible to be equally as horrified by racism or homophobia as by the torture of innocents. It is possible to love someone even when you are angered by their actions, and even when you don't like to be around that person. I know, I've done all of the above! In the same day!

Every one of us has a right to our feelings. They are a part of us, not to be regulated by the opinions, expectations, or ideas of others. They are our emotional bodies, and who has the right to tell you what you can and cannot do with your own body?